March 26, 2013

If Same Sex Marriage Really Leads to Polygamy, Shouldn't Christians Want to Get Gay Married?

So, like Prop 8 is now going before the supreme court which is... interesting. I guess.

There is a little bitty part of me that wants to point out how awkward the push for Marriage Equality has become. How it has pushed aside other more pressing concerns within the queer community. Issues such as poverty, homelessness, HIV/AIDS, employment discrimination, trans issues. On why people never ask why state sanctioned marriage exists in the first place and why do married people deserve easier access to housing, education, and healthcare and so on.

However, I thought it might be fun to put together some responses to some of the reasons that are used to oppose same sex marriage.

Here goes:
Same Sex Marriage will lead to polygamy.
If this were true, all Christians should be wanting to get gay married. See, polygamy was practiced in the Bible so if polygamy were to be legalized in the U.S., the U.S. would therefore become a more Biblical Nation.

Same Sex Marriage is unnatural.
So is walking on water, turning water into wine, and rising from the dead.

Gays need to recruit in order for their numbers too grow
And remind me again what exactly these "Christian missionaries" who keep knocking on my door are doing?

Gay Marriage will destroy the very fabric of society
This is true, a lot of fabric needs to be cut up and destroyed to make wedding dresses and tuxedos. The solution is obvious. Ban Marriage! Save the nation's fabric supply!

Marriage is necessary for procreation.
True again! Nobody who is unmarried can get pregnant! And everybody who does get married can automatically have kids. Infertility is never an issue if a couple is legitimately married. Heck, God didn't even need to have sex with Mary in order for the birth of Jesus to occur. He simply got married to her and presto! Baby Jesus just happened! As opposed to God implanting a fetus in her without her consent and then sending an angel to tell her what had already taken place. I mean it couldn't possibly have been a legitimate rape or her body would
have shut the whole thing down! Oh wait...

All kids require two opposite sex parents in order to not grow up to become murdering psychopaths or bratty socialists.
Because Cain and Abel both had Adam and Eve as parents and turned out fine. Meanwhile, Jesus had two dads and he was a lazy brat who threw temper tantrums in church over the mere presence of hard working business men. One must assume he was jealous of their success, unnatural hippy socialist that he was.

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